Being mom

I have been mothering for almost 21 years and I have to admit, it has not gotten any easier. I still struggle with doubts and wondering if I am doing okay. I can look back at things I have done that may not have been the best mothering choice. For instance the time I told Kelsey I was taking a pencil sharpener to the police to be fingerprinted. She swore up and down that she had nothing to do with the broken crayon in the sharpener that I had told her not to put crayons in. Oh, and she was still the only child....hmmmm! She cried and begged me not to go to the police. Yes, it is pretty funny now but it was very upsetting to her then.

Another moment of brilliance was putting a tv in the girls room. It may work for some families but I just couldn't stand waking up at 5:00 in the morning, or other hours of the night, to the sound of cartoons blaring.

How about getting after a little one that keeps coming in my room during the night because her tummy hurts and then she throws up all over her older sisters stuff.  Really, I thought she was just being a pickle. I didn't know she was really sick! Well, I got to clean puke when I would have rather been sleeping, but that is what moms do.

We nurse until we feel like we are just a giant boob, we help a little girl pee by the side of the road because we forgot to have her go potty before we left, we hurry to the school when our little one (a freshmen in high school) won't come out of the bathroom, and we go without so many things so our kiddos can have their needs and wants met.

I wouldn't' t have it any other way! It is not always easy but being a mom is one of the best things that I have been blessed with. I have learned to relax...a lot! It really will be okay. I have learned that a child's way of cleaning does need coaching and guidance but the job they did is better than it was before they started...usually! They are learning and someday I am sure I will enjoy spending time in their homes that they keep just fine.

Now I rarely ever fold laundry or empty the dishwasher because this is part of the girls daily chores. The clothes are sometimes crumpled or the socks don't match but someday, before I know it, I will be back to doing it all. So, for now I am thankful for the ups and downs and the joys of having four wonderful girls. I pray the girls will give me grace and realize that I did the best that I knew to do.

I may even organize my silverware drawer but for now...I'll take it just like it is!

Fish Hatchery

Today marked another homeschool year coming to an end. The day started foggy and a little cooler than expected for an outdoor field trip to the fish hatchery.  As we walked around the grounds the cool breeze felt so good and the scenery was just beautiful.  The kids got to see the holding tanks for fish eggs, and all of the tanks the fish move through until they are ready to be moved to their new home. It only takes about 2 to 3 weeks and the fish are ready for their big move. We also enjoyed feeding the fish at the holding ponds.







 I think the favorite by far was the tadpole tank. The girls could have spent hours at that one tank. There were tadpoles of every size.  It can take up to 2 years for the metamorphosis to take place. God's creation is just amazing! Two weeks and fish are ready for the big lake but two years and many tadpoles are still growing and changing!











When our time came to an end we made our way over to the Rainbow park for a picnic lunch and some great time playing with friends.  I especially enjoy these times because I get to visit with some wonderful ladies.  Some special friendships have developed and spending time catching up is always uplifting to me.  However, I think sometimes I may talk to much at these gatherings. I guess I am making up for all the time I spend around the kids...all day...every day!

It is hard to believe that we have completed our 6th year of homeschooling. I cannot even begin to share with you the ups and downs in this journey so far but as each day ends I know deep down in my heart that the Lord blesses our persistence and perseverance. The ultimate goal is for our children to grow into young women that love the Lord with all of their hearts, soul, mind and strength. Goals are a vision or plan for the future and there are steps to take to reach those goals.  Just like the fish eggs that start out in a small cylinder move to larger tanks as they grow, so are my daughters starting out in my care with my daily guidance.  Eventually they will move to the outside pond just as the fish do.  The fish that have grown strong will continue in the lake and that is our goal with our daughters in their life pursuits that they will move ahead, standing firm and not falling away from the path.  The steps are important...small steps along their path with their direction coming from our amazing creator, the Lord God Almighty!


"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths." Proverbs 3:5-6